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Drained Job Seekers: Family Making it Worse?

The teachings of law of attraction put much emphasis on how our thoughts and actions including those of groups that we associate with can directly affect how we achieve our goals in life. The reason why birds of the same feathers flock together isn’t just because their feathers are similar but because a variety of the aspects of their lives is similar. For example wake up and retire time, food types they enjoy, how and when, goals they pursue and the list is endless.

I have also come to learn that energy is transferable, if you spend time with individuals who nag and complain about everything, sooner or later, you will join the band wagon and the same applies to when you spend most of your time with positive people.
Job search can be draining should a job seeker fail to identify the importance of self-care and worse is when the closest family members haven’t implemented the right care and support system for their jobless member.
Below are a few red flags that can help a job seeker can use a guide to identifying that something is off and set a plan of action towards addressing that feeling of helplessness.
Nagging Children, Spouse or Relatives

Perhaps, you have had a successful career previously and yes off course your career took a toll on your family time in the past. Even though you just lost your job and can’t wait to land the next role, you are faced with requests from needy family members who want you to be home with them, now that you are “free”. For example, your 7 year old son is happier that you are always home when he comes from school, he makes remarks that sound like “I am happy that you are always home when I come back from school, I get to play my favorite video game with you!”, “I wish you don’t find a job soon, I want you to be here with me all the time” or if you are lucky to have a child who understands the importance of a working parent or just being an adult by keeping the woes to himself/ herself, his or her statement will read something like this, “You are a good person, why can’t anyone give you a job?’’.
While such remarks can melt a parent’s heart, they can also be happiness disguised in guilt and as a result when a job seeker is submitting job applications the feeling of guilt is likely to replay itself, sending mixed energies with your applications and as a result the possibility of getting a call for an interview from that amazing company reduces. The energies of “I need this job’’ versus those of “I need to be home for my children’’ cannot agree with each other! Only one can manifest itself at a time depending on the focus you put on each of it. Other encounters will be other family members or your spouse either pushing you to get a job or discouraging you, those actions could drain you as well.

Fear maniacs disguised as a supportive circle

Perhaps you are living with a partner who has a big deal of insecurities around their life. They are constantly controlled by the feeling of fear that by any chance you land a job and start making your own money, you will be self-sufficient and they will lose control over you. Such partners are hypocrites who would show you that they are supportive while in a nutshell they are simply arranging blockades that hinders your goal of landing a job.

Non supportive partners are likely to use such expressions to you when you feel the weight of job search taking a toll on you. “You don’t need to worry about having a job, I have a job and I can support us all”, “I know of people who don’t have a roof over their head and food in their stomachs but they are still not depressed for not finding a job, why can’t you be thankful that I have a job” or worst of all your partner could say “Honey, I am not complaining about providing for us, you really don’t need to find a job’’.
Such conversations can control everything in your job search. Consider it as having a team-mate whose goal isn’t to win as yours is. Ideally you are likely to end up losing than winning putting into considerations that negativity spread far and wide like a super active erupting volcano! Your job search will be affected greatly by such a partner because you both can’t reach a point of ultimate synchronicity! It’s important that and individual with whom you share so much as part of your team, share your vision and exert his or her togetherness as well agree with you in your pursuit of a job.
Otherwise all hope is not lost, all of the above can be rectified with simple steps and communication being the cornerstone to finding lasting solutions that will eventually bring forth a job to the job seeker as well as wonderful family relations. Check out my next article on the same topic, Drained Job Seekers: How to deal with family Influence on it
Eve Aboka

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